Call Me When You Get This

HEY HEY HEY! HAPPY TUESDAY!

So earlier today, I got a phone call from the Children’s Ministry Coordinator at Westside, where I go to church. And she said that they want me to officially take over leadership and development for the Junior High! CAN YOU BELIVE IT! IT’S LIKE CHRISTMAS ALL OVER AGAIN!

I LOVE those kids and I can’t wait to see how God makes all this cool stuff move along! I mean, this is like the BIGGEST answer to prayer ever! I am so so so excited! We’ll be meeting soon to go over logistics and share ideas and such… but man. I feel like eating a giant cake in celebration! (I won’t, but I’d like to) 😉

Thank you thank you thank you for all of you who have been part of this journey with me thus far—and it’s only gonna get better! 😀

On another note, today is Cinco De Mayo. I think I might make some mexican food for dinner to celebrate. Although, truth be told, pizza is my weakness…and I have a pizza in my freezer that beckons my name every time i open that freezer door… hmmm. we’ll see. In any case, I’d like to say HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO! … not to be confused with the 6th of May… which is tomorrow.

PS: the plants are growing quite nicely!

If I Could Make A Living

So I woke up early this morning to eat breakfast, iron my clothes, etcetera etcetera because I got a callback yesterday from the Residence Inn Marriott Hotel down by south Lake Union area! It’s for the Front Desk Clerk position and it pays $10.25 an hour with some awesome benefits! The interview went really well and I was really pleased with the positivity that came from the interviewer when it was all done. I should find out by Thursday if I got the job or not…so…that’s tomorrow. 😀 Then, after I got done with the interview, I walked across the street to the Marina and took a walk on the pier for some quiet time and just to stand amazed at how awesome God was for providing a sliver of hope in such a seemingly hopeless time.

Since I quit my last job, I’ve gotten told left and right that I’m probably not going to find a job and that I should be worried that I won’t get a job and I get the “Good Luck” that comes with apprehension in the tone and the eyes that look sorry for me. But I’ve come to the conclusion…that if God has helped me every step along the way with this big move and with so many other things in my life…I highly doubt He’s gonna bail on me right now. I know that our economy is spiraling down and that unlike the SNL Bjork skit, we can’t pay for things with clouds. But I’m hopeful and I’m secure in the fact that as long as I’m doing EVERY SINGLE THING I can on my end, God’s gonna come through on His end. Yeah, I know…it takes a lot of faith and a lot of trust…and believe me…I’m gripping onto those tightly! 😀

As I was walking down the pier, I got another call from a lady that works for a small publication called the PRESENT TIMES, which focuses on “co-counseling” and fighting racism. The job opening is for a layout and production assistant, so I will be making corrections to edited articles and working with InDesign to process their publications. This job pays $11-13 an hour but doesn’t have as many benefits. But working in journalism and publications is a love of mine. I should know by the end of the week if I got the job.

Obviously there are so many things I need to look up and research before jumping into either job, but in the meantime, I’m still putting in applications at various local places and through craigslist. 😀 And I’m still believing and hoping and praying for the right door to open and for the guts to walk through it 😀

Here’s some pictures I took while walking around today! :

Unbelievable

I am 27 years old, the daughter of a funny man and a serious woman. I feel like i’ve gained so much from each of my parents through the years. A love for laughter, a disability to trust adults, how to give time and energy, and how to cook; Learning the difference between right and wrong, learning to survive, learning how manage a busy schedule, and learning how to love unconditionally. It’s amazing how different my parents are. And I’m so thankful for that. Because I get this great mix of the two where I learn both ends of the spectrum. It’s amazing to me the different roles I have learned to play through the years. A puppet for my brother, a leader and antagonizer to my sister, an audience for my father, and a therapist to my mother. I’ve grown up in the crazy hemisphere of an awkward and painful divorce. I’ve watched my brother lose faith, my sister lose the opportunity for a great education. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen great things as well, but when divorce splits your family, it’s so much easier to notice the wreckage…because the rebuilding takes so long and depends on the nature and demeanor of each party involved.

Take for instance the fact that my mother and stepmother almost had it out when I was in the hospital having kidney surgery. I was minutes away from going ‘under the knife’ and my mom decides to take a jab at my father and stepmother who are in the room. This led to raised voices, and harsh words, and an almost fight. All the while, I’m laying in pain on a hospital stretcher with IVs running through my veins and with a weak voice, settling for yelling in my mind: ARE YOU GUYS KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?

I’ve had so many moments like this in my life. And always I’m asking the same question: SERIOUSLY GUYS? ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?

And actually, I just got a call from my mom tonight. This is always a love/hate thing. Because she calls me…to talk about my brother and sister. I don’t think I’ve actually heard her ask me how my day is going without me saying how it’s going and then her jumping right into a discussion about how much she hates my sister’s boyfriend or how my brother or sister lied to her or something or other that I can do absolutely nothing about. So I missed her call, and called her back. And it started out the way they always start out:

me: hey. sorry i missed your call.
mom: yeah i called. (while sounding upset)
me: oh. well is everything okay?
mom: yeah. i guess. (still sounding upset, taking a sighing breath) no. maybe not.
me: oh. okay. are you alright?
mom: well…it’s just… your sister made me mad today.
me: oh. i see. okay. are you gonna be okay?
mom: yeah..it’s just that she blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah….Jaime did …..blah blah blah blah…and he blah blah blah blah….and she has to pay blah blah blah blah blah because he convinced her to blah blah blah blah…
me: well mom. you know, she’s a grown girl and she makes her own decisions. And if that’s what she wants to do, you do your best to give her a way out, and then let it go.
mom: i know. i should let it go. but she blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah… and he says I shouldn’t tell him what to do… blah blah blah…
me: then don’t tell him what to do.
mom: yeah you’re right. i just hate that he blah blah blah blah blah… and your sister misses you…
me: she misses me?
mom: yeah. she misses you.
me: why does she miss me?
mom: well so you can watch the kids for her.
me: oh. so she misses me because she wants me to be a babysitter?
mom: well it’s just so hard for her right now.
me: oh. okay. well, i’m sorry she misses me. But i’m not moving back.
mom: you’re so far away.
me: i know. but it’s not like we were close when i WAS living there. I don’t understand why it’s a big deal now. I mean, aside from me being a babysitter. why doesn’t she just hire a babysitter?
mom: well because it costs money.
me: yeah. i heard that most babysitters do charge money. hmmm.. well. i’m sorry. but i’m still not moving back.
mom: i know.
me: uh, hey mom. sorry to interrupt, but you DID call me earlier right?
mom: yeah i did.
me: so uh, why DID you call me?
mom: cause i wanted to see how you were doing.
me: well, since you call all the time to ask me how i’m doing, but never really prod any further when I say good, I’ll just tell you how i’m doing..blah blah blah blah..and this awesome thing happened.. blah blah blah…and i’m working on this screenplay.. blah blah blah blah.
mom: that’s great!
me: yeah, and blah blah blah blah blah…
mom: you know what just makes me so mad about Jaime (my sister’s boyfriend) is that he just blah blah blah blah and she just blah blah blah blah.

and she goes on for another 10 minutes rehashing the same problems to me, and i continue to say, “Well if you did all you could, then you did all you could and you just let her choose how she wants to live.” This usually ends her saying, “Well. maybe we should just not talk about that.” or “Yeah, you’re right. But you don’t understand…blah blah blah”

un.believable.

PS: yes, i realize i’m a selfish brat. but i really hope that one day: 1. my mom takes my advice and follows through with it. and 2. that my family learns to gain a sense of togetherness that doesn’t involve fighting over silly stuff. and 3. that i learn from their mistakes. 4. i will understand my family.

Name That Tune